26
2008
Harassment Is No Joke
I may be guilty of harassment in the workplace.
No, I haven’t received a complaint from an upset employee of a client of mine. Nor have I been accused of insulting or angering a co-worker for some kind of slur or off colour joke. So what exactly has prompted this unsolicited confession from me?
Over the past years, I, and my partners at TriOpus Group, have had the interesting pleasure of facilitating Harassment Awareness sessions to literally hundred of employees of a major international corporation. It was these experiences that helped me come to the realization that I may have been guilty of harassing in the past.
The sessions I facilitated were made up of two major sections. The first focused on the corporate policy of the client and the legal responsibilities of the client and each of its employees.
The second and far more interesting section looked at trying to define what does and does not constitute harassment. What was frustrating to the employees was that they were looking for a quick and easy definition of harassment. They soon realized that it was not that simple. Often the groups concluded that although they couldn’t adequately define it, they would at least know it when they saw it.
But the big learning for all of us in these sessions was the realization that what we thought was or wasn’t harassment really doesn’t matter one bit. The only thing that matters is whether or not the so-called ‘victim’ thinks he or she has been harassed. And therein lies the challenge for all of us.
Harassment can and does manifest itself in many ways from indelicate jokes and sexist remarks to both violence and sexual assault in the workplace. In all of us accepting that harassment is defined by the reaction of ‘the victim’ is the first step in eliminating the problem.
I hear people say, ‘C’mon, lighten up. It’s only a joke.’ And it may well be. But if that joke offends a co-worker or, worse still, offends someone who overhears the joke, should you really be telling it in the first place? Probably not.
Here’s my advice. If you are in the slightest doubt as to how something you say or do may be interpreted by people that you work with, then don’t do it or say it. It’s as simple as that. Put that speed bump in front of you and you are on your way to doing your part to eliminate harassment where you work. Remember this. Your intentions have little to do with it. ‘I never meant to offend anyone’ is something that I hear a lot. But it makes no difference. If they are offended, it doesn’t matter what you meant.
Which brings us back to me and my confession. As I look back over my career, I am certain that I have said and done things without first thinking of the impact my actions may have on other workers. And that is why I may well have been guilty of harassment.
With all the other challenges we face in the workplace, whether we are the leaders or the lead, there is no place for harassment at work.
Let’s all do our bit.
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